Thursday, October 18, 2012

Nathan Bransford

You may recognize the name- he writes the Jacob Wonderbar books (I have never read them but have heard them touted.) He also used to be a literary agent and currently writes a blog to help writers write better, and get published.

He is hilarious. I LOVE his blog.

Whether you are a reader, writer, teacher, parent, or just enjoy something relatively smart and funny you will LOVE his blog.

I am linking two of his posts that are basically about writing no-no's. I was laughing so hard when I finished with them my side hurt. (Teachers, this is a must read I mean it- so darn funny.)

Writing Maladies Post 1

Writing Maladies Post 2

Here is a hint of what you will be missing if you do NOT read these blogs:

From Post One:
Chatty Cathy: So, like, I don't know if you've noticed but OMG teenagers use so much freaking slang!!! And multiple exclamation points!!! In a novel not a blog post!!! And so I'm all putting tons of freaking repetitious verbal tics into totes every sentence and it's majorly exhausting the reader because WAIT I NEED TO USE ALL CAPS.

(BTW- I totally use all caps. In my books. Must revise that.)

From Post Two:
Fantasy Overload:
“We are hearty warriors! Let us share a hearty chuckle! Ha ha ha!” Pentrarch said.
There was a glint in Lentwendon’s eye as he took a swill from a mighty cistern of ale. He bellowed a deep laugh and clapped his friend on the back.
“I say,” Pentrarch said, “What is it about fantasy novels that lends itself to such stilted, manly camaraderie? Do we not have normal interactions?” 
“We do not,” Lentwendon said, his voice suddenly grave. “We do not. We prefer to express our friendship with great noise and clapping of shoulders and brood quietly but stoically when matters turn serious. It is the same with our women.”
“Oh yes,” Pentrarch said “Our women are quietly supportive that we must do battle in far off lands, and they always have weary, knowing eyes. In truth they are the strong ones.”
Lentwendon nodded as he stared quietly at his cistern. “And ale, always ale.”

1 comment:

  1. So somehow I missed this when you originally posted it, but this was HILARIOUS. Thank you.