Saturday, May 23, 2009

The Moeck's are NEVER Having Kids

People used to tell me that getting called to nursery was the best kind of birth control. I never felt that way, or thought that way until now. Adam and I recently got called to the temple committee in our ward, which we were very excited about because we get to do it together, we are NOT teaching CTR 5, and we would make the effort to go to the temple more.

So this Friday there was a ward temple trip, and we were asked by the committee chair to help with the "child care". (I called it babysitting which apparently is very taboo.) There were four adults, and 30 kids. Shouldn't be that big of a deal. When I was younger I used to watch 10 kids on my own. Kids are great when they play together.

Rephrase, kids are great when they play together and they have taught to be well behaved, they are not sick, and your committee chair doesn't distract them when they are all quiet. We had a parent who dropped off her son who couldn't have even been nursery age yet, and told us as she did that he was running a high fever. He threw-up hot dogs and eggs twice. The chair cleaned him up, and the toys he threw up on I just tossed out. I don't care if they were the churches- if there is no bleach to scour them they get trashed. He then passed out on the floor.

We had a baby who refused to NOT cry unless you held him in your arms, facing outwards, and walked around. Every time I sat he would scream. So, he spent a lot of time on the floor, on is blanket, crying. I'm sorry, but when you have thirty kids I can't spent the entire five hours holding one. (Oh yes- we were there from 5:45 to 10:15 at night.)

We had two twelve year old kids who hated me by the end of the night because I wouldn't let them play on the stage. In all reality I didn't mind if they did- they could have been making out in the back and I wouldn't care. But when they climbed all the little two and three year olds wanted to and if they fell off when I turned my head... exactly. LAW SUIT. I never fancied myself a yeller but how many times I yelled at them to GET DOWN I just may turn out to be one.

We had another little boy who walked out of the building constantly if he didn't get his way, another girl who shared her popcorn and cracker treats which she wasn't suppose to get into, strewing them ALL OVER the cultural hall and causing crying kids who didn't get as much as they wanted. Another boy fell asleep spread eagle on the gym floor, one girl went to the bathroom every fifteen minutes, two brothers decided to play in the water fountain and go soaked, and one girl almost pulled down my pants.

Then when we finally got them settled into chairs and on the floor, quiet, calm, watching Nanny McFee, Adam and I had picked up puting away legos, crayons, balls, food etc. We sat down, me holding the baby of course for breathe, when the chair pulls out chalk and the chalkboards and says, "Hey kids, lets play a game!" then ran SCREAMING to the gym. And then, she left them there! She walked out and isappeared for 20 minutes! So Adam and I were BACK to garding the stage, watching out for puke, and making sure no one killed the others.

To top it off, when the parents came back to have treats, the only other couple in the ward without kids who we are friends with, and who happen to be in primary looked around the room and said, "That kids parents weren't at the temple. Neither were that kid's." That's right- people dropped their kids off for a free date night.

Now, in my ward back at home, when parents go to the temple the young women run the nursery for service hours so ALL the parents can go. Any other time, they get paid to babysit. I wanted to walk up to those parents and demand 30 bucks from each of them I was so mad.

Now to be fair, there was one girl who was the sweetest thing in the world. Every time I told her no she would hug me to respond, then NOT do the thing I told her not to do, and every time her brother cried she would help him out. I told her mother I loved her. And the boy who was sick Adam had bonded with only becasue he didn't climb on anything, didnt cry, or scream. Of course, he did throw-up everywhere.

The rest of the evening, after the kids and parenst left and we got to go home, wasn't so bad. We got home around ten thirty and then stayed up watching Friends and dinking around on our computers for most hours of the night.

But heavens, I dont think I have ever had such a concenration of misbehaved kids all in one room before. I dont care if I'm not their mom. MY mom taught us that we act BETTER outside of home than inside otherwise we were in trouble. It's like the kids that are running around the grocery store. In my family shopping was a privelage, and if you wanted to live through the experience, you DID NOT misbehave.

Anyways, if the Lord was trying to tell us that right now is not our time for kids, we most definitly got the picture. Maybe when I'm thirty we'll think about it again.


  1. I would have been SO ANGRY at those cheap parents too!! I'm sorry... but LDS people can be that way sometimes more than others. Good for you for restraining yourself from demanding the money. Some people's children!

  2. hahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!! Some kids are so evil!!! When I taught Sunbeams with 8 kids in one tiny classroom, I wanted to cry every time I went to church. It was horrible. Kids are so bad these days, I think my kids will hate and fear me because I am going to be so strict about manners. You better be blessed up the ying yang for watching those horrors.